There’s something about a guy who knows how to play the guitar that automatically bumps him up about five levels on the attractive scale. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that it displays that they work well with their hands. Or maybe it appeals to that female artsy, emotional side – Who cares if the only song you know how to play is Blind Melon’s No Rain, you’ve got feelings! Regardless of the reasoning behind it, as soon as you mention that you know how to strum out the A minors and the F sharps, I’m quickly rationalizing away all your profile faults like it’s going out of style. Listed UFC as an interest? I suppose it’s not that bad. Wearing a 90′s leather jacket? Clothing can be worked around. Busting out the LOL? It’s a common expression, I guess. Sound pretty prickish and will probably treat me like crap? Ah well, you play the guitar! After you drop the g-word, any normal deal breakers suddenly fall by the wayside. I simply don’t have the time to raise any eyebrows when I’m too busy daydreaming about you throwing rocks at my window in the middle of the night only to find you serenading me below with your Larrivee acoustic. Swoon-effing-city. So if you initially decided to pick up the guitar because you heard chicks dig guys who can play, I’m your return on investment baby. Sign me up to be your Penny Lane.
There’s something about a well groomed, thick bristled beard that elicits some serious pupil dilating, heart palpitating, palm sweating, straight up junkie behaviour on my part. The symptoms only get hotter if the follicled masterpiece in question is that of the red variety or show hints of the ginger gene nestled in there amongst the array of other colours. Get the tourniquet ready for another round fellas, I’ve got some swooning to do. But hold up, patchy peach fuzz and chin straps need not apply – The beard is meant to be a work of textured art, not a fifth grade science project or an outline of your face in case I can’t figure out where it ends. I know that some girls are not all that into the beard, and some will even go so far as to mock the beard. These girls are fools. FOOLS. What is there not to like? You’re manly and rustic – You can slap on some flannel, cut down a spruce tree and build me a log cabin in a dire strait situation if need be. If gives off the perfect allure of laid backness but shows that you can take care of yourself if it’s well maintained. The only tricky thing about the beard profile picture is that you can never really be too sure if the beard still exists or if it was just a lazy week that cranked out a decent picture. There’s nothing more soul crushing than accepting to meet a gorgeous beard only to be greeted by a smooth baby face. Don’t play with my heart like that! It’s not nice!
Posted by The Jig Is Up 
